Crawling across the bed with my whipped ass in the air and two fingers in my pussy, or maybe something metal, or maybe something altogether different, and maybe a thumb in my ass and sometimes something on my clit, but I don’t always know, because all I can think of is this one, and then this one, and the next, and they keep banging into each other like out of control dodgem cars and I can’t keep up, can’t get hold of anything, can’t get a grip on one before it’s the next, can’t breathe, can’t say when to stop because the next one’s always almost there.
“Are you all right?” he asks, later, and I think what a bloody stupid question, how the fuck do I know?
Sometimes I feel as though I’m being tamed with little kindnesses, domesticated with random acts of sweetness until I’ll accede with dignity, and concede graceful assent to a fleeting, temporary dependence. A taming of convenience, because then I’m lulled into tranquil acquiescence, a plaything serenely waiting to be wound up, turned on and put through my paces. And then it suits nobody for me to be polite and mannered and dignified and sweet, because sometimes I’m better taken raw.
Sometimes I feel pampered and precious, and sometimes I feel like a subhuman fucktoy, but it seems the two can find some precarious conciliation.
February 24, 2008 at 5:34 pm
Seeing you lose control to that extent would be very… enjoyable. But please, remind me not to ask you if you’re all right.
February 24, 2008 at 8:07 pm
I like this tender side of you.
February 24, 2008 at 8:38 pm
So, are you alright now, or what?
February 24, 2008 at 9:21 pm
Marianne, thanks. Just check if I’m breathing.
Ani, don’t worry, it won’t last
Duke, yes, I’m perfectly fine, now, thanks. Fully recovered.
February 25, 2008 at 1:46 am
this is my 1st read of yours and i found it both sexually stimulating and thought proviking. i’m also a introverted exhibitionist (like the way you phrase that).
i’ve recently begun to explore kinkier parts of my sexuality and will def plan on reading more of your blog!
February 25, 2008 at 5:01 pm
MMmmm . . . I love that spot where pampered and fucktoy intersect!
February 27, 2008 at 5:27 am
creatura, I ‘m so glad you’re enjoying it.
Bunny, yes, I quite like it too
Akrazael (sorry, your comment didn’t carry over), maybe you’re right that in that reaching that state *is* the pampered bit.
February 27, 2008 at 2:53 pm
*Nods head sagely and empathises*
February 27, 2008 at 8:21 pm
Thought you might
July 11, 2008 at 11:30 pm
I enjoyed your writing style and I’ve added you to my Reader. Keep these posts coming.
July 14, 2008 at 4:43 pm
Cheers. I shall.